What happen to manners? And sportman’s etiquette. Just as a moving boater slows to pass an anchored boater avoiding risk of waves and disruption, so should the mannerisms of a rafter to a fishermen. And vice versus. You don’t see me climbing in that tube of yours mister Rafter and polluting it do you? So, why piss on my fish parade? Ok, so we got a little heated. Not all rafters are bad. But just wait until you check out the photos.
Ok so you’re probably thinking, “you should know better Riverbums to set foot in rafting waters.” Well turns out this river, the Little Wolf near Appleton Wi, is “usually” open for rafting downstream from the main bridge. But, due to massive rains and high water level, they decided (unbeknownst to us) on offering rafting above the main bridge. First time in 5 years. Great! So for a good 4 hours we put up with the rafts that just kept coming. Don’t get us wrong, we are all for enjoying a nice raft down a beautiful river. However, this was just a crowd of rafts, everybody bunched up together barely floating down like a wet pile of soft cotton stuck in-between 2 boulders. I almost felt embarrassed for them. At times, we had to wait by a boulder or on the side of the banks in fear we would get run over. Cause, it’s not like you can properly steer a raft, especially someone you can barely see their toes over their belly and has been drunk since 6 am.
We enjoy seeing the occasional kayaker or tuber. But, this wasn’t just a good ole fashion day in the water. We counted close to a hundred empty beer cans, 8 pairs of sandals, 4 sunglasses, and a suspicious looking pair of black speedoes left to rot in the water. It’s a shame that people can’t pack out what they pack in. Especially ones just lying back doing not much of anything. Like the NY Subway on monday morning work rush or the Chicago 94 spur on a Sunday evening in early Summer or even the fast lane at Six Flags… it was too damn crowded. So, we fished for a few more hours, racking in about 10 smallies, 2 northerns, and ok we’ll admit it, a few “miscasts” towards tubers. We decided to pack it in when we noticed 5 more buses full of invasive species but not before we snapped a view memories of the day…
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The Last Fisherman
The Reverend AC preaching repentance and salvation to a small group of rafters
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AC at a pass with the rafters. Get ready for the questions… |
And now for questions we get asked by rafters and the answers we wish we could use…
- “Are you guys Fishin?” No Flounder, we’re playing poker!
- “How’s the fishing?” Awful (cause if you say good, they’ll come back and this time with a rod too.)
- “What you fishing for?” Rafters
- “Catch anything?” Ya, Rafters
- “Is that a girl” No, that’s just a side effect of raftsickness. You better get out immediately, and bushwhack the rest of the way through tick infested brush as you trespass in a gun toting, Vietnam veteran’s farmland who is hiding in one of the trees waiting for an intruder. And nothing says easy target than a half naked man carrying a bright yellow tube and toting Coors light reflectors.
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Dad with a glowing smallie |
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MidAir Bass |
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A northern on spinner bait |
Since we still had a day left off, we decided to jam pack it with fun events like half a day in the Apple River and half a day at the famous Oshkosh Airshow…
It's amazing how fish get used to rafters. That pic of the bass in midair is great.
Aaah, rafters. Get them every Shad season on the American River. Sacramento County has an ordinance that there is no booze allowed on the river on holiday weekends and when ever they decide to ban it like the "rafters gone wild" day. Personally I'd get a small pen knife and as you palm it stab a bunch (of rafts, not rafters although that would be OK too). You can tell them the fish did it.